Err I still feel sick ugh... We went and saw the Military Tattoo tonight omg it was amazing! I'm really glad I got to see it before we left, now I feel like I have really experienced Scotland, true we have to miss out on the trips we were going to take and everyone is going to give me alot of shit and think I'm fucking retarded but you know what they haven't been the kinda stuff I have and they don't know the situation so I shouldn't take their shit, we are dealing with the situation the best we can and that way is to come home. I have always been one for living up the moment but right now I can't be selfish and I have to think about how this will affect the rest of my life and my family's life, this is such a crucial time we are all at crossroads right now, so this is necessary and if people want to say I'm throwing away a great oppurtunity well so be it, again they don't understand. And I did get to stay here for a month and despite my complaining about my dad and what not it has been a really awesome experience and who knows, maybe I will be able to continue exploring Europe someday, it's just right now the timing and the situation don't add up, yeah it's a bummer but hey thats life. "When life gives you lemons, make some fucking lemonade!" haha aww my Mikie hehe. I feel really good about this now, I mean I got to see one of the top things on my list and it was simply amazing, i'd like to share that with someone someday it was just so cool, again who knows? Dad said to just go home and make him proud, and I am determined to do it. These will be some tough times coming up but I know we will get through it ok. I feel really optimistic about this, I need to help out mom and macy and well myself so I have to be stong. Just keep my head up and not let everything get me down. Thats my mission.